To the lady with the sensible shoes…
Well there I was. In the loo….the bathroom…the potty. Doing what one does in there. As always I look at the feet of those in the stalls next to me. Hey…I am a mom and this is one of the rare times I was in a store kid free and able to sit! What can I say…I observe. Anywhooo…I noticed two very different pairs of feet beside me. They were mothers as I heard them talking to their littles ones outside the stall.
One woman was wearing sensible shoes. Black. Lace-up loafer things that I imagined came from a sensible shoe store. One like Sears or JC Penny’s. Black. A solid choice. Goes with just about anything. But the other woman had on high heeled boots. Brown. You know the kind. Goes up to her knee or past. Skinny heel. Makes the click-clack when she walks. Bought at someplace with a boutique in the name.
There I was in my flip-flops. Doing what I needed to do. As I ran into both women washing their hands they looked just like I had imagined. The sensible shoe mom had her hair pulled back into a smart-looking ponytail. No makeup that I could see. A little on the older side. A classic, natural beauty that was not overstated. The sensible shoe mom had her big bag of tricks, and I can imagine in her bag was her wallet, baby wipes, water bottles (stainless steel kind), shopping list, organic chapstick, recycle bags, coupons by order of items in the grocery aisle. As well as a ziplock bag with bandages and baby Tylenol. I saw this mom talking to 2 smaller versions of herself except they were wearing sneakers.
On the other side was the boot lady. Long hair, unnaturally straight. Blonde. Makeup to perfection. Slightly tan…even though summer came to an end several months ago. A small purse that I imagined fit her credit/debit card and her sparkly phone which her daughter…a mini version of herself…was texting on. I think the daughter must have been 8. Daughter had same hair except for a natural wave. Normal looking blonde. The girl had a similar type of boots. Not as high but certainly nothing you would want to run around on the playground with. As both moms were finishing up the boot mom walked out first. Naturally, why wouldn’t she? Her baggage was far lighter.
I saw the sensible shoe mom do something that startled me. She was ushering her 2 out as well, but she stopped and looked at herself in the mirror. I saw her try to fluff her ponytail. With an audible sigh, as if to say she was less than the boot woman, she shook her head and walked out. I wanted to stop her and give her a hug and say something to let her know she was perfect just the way she was. She should know that her value was not in the amount of makeup she wore or how small her purse was or how high her shoes were.
Why are we comparing ourselves? Why are we, as women, as mothers always trying to keep up? As I said I was wearing flip-flops. It is my thing. I wear them all year long…YES….even in the snow. I have pictures of doing recess duty with my flip flops in the snow. There are some days I am dressed like I just walked out of an LL Bean catalog and other days I could be mistaken for Sasquatch.
So my dear fellow mom with the sensible shoes….don’t compare yourself. Perhaps the boot mom was having a stellar hair day decided to take herself out or perhaps every day she looks like this? Perhaps she has such an easy life she can spend the time needed to look that great. Or even perhaps….just perhaps….the makeup is covering up something else. A marriage where she feels like she has to look like perfection? A childhood spent being put down due to lack of beauty or value? Who knows? Or perhaps her life is just perfect and she was born with good looks and married well.
Regardless it does not make you any less than wonderful! You have two beautiful daughters that will be in this world where even at a young age, they will be told they need to be different, look different, act differently. Sensible shoe mom….be comfortable in your own skin. Be who you were created to be. A role model to your daughters for when the world starts inundating them with unrealistic ideals of what beauty is. Be you. Makeup. No makeup. Brown shoes. Boots. Flip flops. Big bag. Small purse. It does not matter. You are beautiful as YOU!